Thought I'd share some FMLs...
Today, my husband was playing Pokemon in bed. He hid the screen from himself and guessed the name of every pokemon encounter based on the sound of their cry. He got all 65 encounters right. This happens every night. FML
Today, I borrowed a novel about Sherlock Holmes from the library and detective novels are always my favorite. I turned a few pages to where characters are introduced. On one of the name, apparently someone circled and wrote "He is the murderer" right next to it. FML
Today, I was talking to a guy at school I had a crush on for a few months. When I asked him for his cell number, he sent me a 7-line math problem to figure out the last 4 digits. I couldn't solve it. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mom married my dad. Now I'm dating my step sister. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His stepmother is my former psychiatrist. She knows every single unflattering detail of my past. FML
Today, I realized that I have serious talks with my dog about hogging the covers. FML
Today, the vet told me that my cat is too fat to clean her own butt after she uses the litter box. I'll have to do it for her. FML
Today, I realized that the only thing that's keeping my boyfriend and me together is the Harry Potter audiobook we started the other day. I don't want to move out before it's done. FML
Today, I found out that what happens in Vegas, stays on Facebook and bank statements. FML
Today, I returned home starved. After making a sandwich with the remaining food in the fridge, I decided to take a shower first before eating it. When I came out, I found my TV, laptop, all the phones and my car keys stolen. I had no way calling the police. Oh, and they ate my sandwich. FML
Today, during our daily commute to the college where my mother works and I attend, my mom decided to tell me all the things she thinks I'm doing wrong with my life, and un-invite me to lunch. As if it wasn't bad enough, she decided to say it all with an Irish accent for some reason. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. FML
Today, my husband and I went to dinner to celebrate our 1st anniversary. I mentioned that we'd never had a single fight. Now, I'm sleeping in the living room and we aren't talking. We got into a fight about if we had ever fought before. FML
Today, I was playing "Who wants to be a millionaire" on my iPhone. I finally made it to the million dollar question when I gave the wrong answer. I was so mad I lost. Then I realized it was the closest I ever came to achieving any of my goals in the past 4 years. FML
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