i'll be here tomorrow, that is if you're here – and you promise to keep this between you and me

I'm trying to slow down on here. I've been mildly successful this month, but I can't help share a bit of my latest happenings.

I met a boy. Two actually. And they are wonderful, adorable little fairy creatures who talk to me with ready smiles and big, confused eyes. AND they have the best names – Carl (every male in Sweden is or wants to be named Carl), and Edwin (pronounced EdVin). They are six and eight and have been teaching me that I take the English language for granted.

I decided that we would talk about our emotions today – heavy first date topic, I know – and I drew 10 blank circles with a different feeling written under each. We were to discuss what each feeling meant and fill in the circle with an appropriate face.

The first three were pretty easy to draw:
Happy: Smiley Face
Sad: Frowny Face
Angry: Eyebrows slanted, teeth bared

Unfortunately, Edwin didn't know what "angry" was, and I was fairly incoherent in my attempted explanation.

"You know..." I made an exaggerated mad face. "Like that. Like if you don't like something." (By the time I'm done with them, they will be fully acquainted with English filler words.)

He stared up at me.

"Umm...like if you're watching football" – I wildly banked on the European football fetish – "and the other team scores a goal against you and you're like 'No!'" I shook my fist.

In retrospect, if he didn't understand the word "angry," he probably didn't understand my extended explanation. I console myself that it was good for him to hear the words anyways.

**

Angry was the beginning of my definition problems. I also found it difficult to define excited: "Like if you're really happy!" I used my enthusiastic, cheering voice. "Yay! Like if your football team scored and you're really happy!" Hopefully he's a little sporty boy and not a little bookish boy. (Yes, he has to be one or the other.)

Then of course, there were the last few emotions that I stuck in to make an even ten: hungry, calm, hyper.

Hungry = not really an emotion, but very easy to describe/communicate.

Calm = Very hard to mime/act out. "You know, it's when you're like this," I leaned back and looked around, mentally deciding not to use the word "chilled." I'm teaching English, not American teen slang.

"Umm...you know. The opposite of excited. When you're excited, you're all crazy and energetic - you know what energy is? No? Okay well it's like when you have a lot of movement. But this is the opposite. You know what opposite is? No? Okay it's like a different thing. Like happy is the opposite of sad." And so on. I kept reverting back to my actions, except it's pretty hard to act out calm.

As it turns out, it's also hard for a six-year-old to draw "calm" in a smiley face and make it look different than "tired," "hungry," and "confused." It's also hard for a college graduate.

Hyper = The last word on the list, and the one I used because the only other one I could come up with was "depressed" and I wasn't sure how that would go over with mum and dad. And, honestly, I didn't want to attempt that explanation. "It's like when you're sad for a long period of time and lose interest in activities that you used to enjoy, and everything seems meaningless and you can't stop thinking about death..." Hmmm.

So Life Advice: It's hard to describe basic words without synonyms. Especially when your vocal expressions appear to be less universal than you thought.

**

I have also found my dream job: someone who wants to pay me to talk to him in English for an hour every week. Why yes, I'll take your money while you fulfill my need for human interaction. Thank you.

My father, naturally, is displeased at the notion of my meeting a strange man for English lessons:

"No. You are not doing this. I don't like this."
"I'm an adult."
"How many adults have been mutilated and butchered? What kind of an answer is that?"

A few minutes further into the conversation:

"What's his name?"
"(name)"
"What does he look like?"
"I don't know I haven't met him."
"Well you're going to meet up, you'll need a description."
"He told me he was a gangstery looking guy with a knife."
"That's very funny ha ha ha ha ha. I'll tell that to the cops when they ask for a description."